Growing.

Today, I am thankful for the chance to grow as a person. Life used to be mine. I lived alone, supported myself. handled my finances, made plans for me and now that has changed. I am a wife now. It is no longer my life but our life. It is no longer my pans but our plans. The thought of having to learn to share a life with someone else used to scare me, but I love it. It causes you to grow and stretch. It allows me to shave off the parts of me that may have been selfish, self-centered, or biased and embrace things that are foreign and difficult. I have always been someone who doesn't let the fear of something new hold me back though. The longing to see what is in the water has always motivated me to dive off  the cliff. Being married is like always having a mirror into your heart. It shows the true you. I guess a lot of marriages might not work because honestly, the first time I noticed the mirror I realized I was not as good or unselfish as I thought. It is easy to want to point out the other persons flaws or blame them for the negative we see in ourselves but the blame game never works. Love becomes so different from those crushes, high school dates, and even adult romances. Love become determination to commit, the willingness to be wrong, the opportunity to grow, the ability to share yourself completely with someone unhindered and without restrictions. It is awfully wonderful and beautifully messy and there will never be anything else like it. And so here is my life at the moment with my new name. Callie Blue has a nice ring to it I think, sounds like a writer.