Tight Spots.

I used to thank God for the good times and plead for relief during the tough ones. My perspective is slowly changing in this. Although the easier times are nice because we all need a break sometimes, it is during the tight spots that i grow. I have felt myself growing this year. I am so much more emotionally stable. I am more relationally mature. I am a learning to let go and let God. I am beginning to realize the hugeness of the responsibility as a Christian i have been given. I have a responsibility to carry his name openly and truthfully. I have a responsibility to share and suffer. I am a leader, a guide, a sister in Christ, a warrior and full of Grace that i am to extend to others. However, God doesn't want me to feel burdened by this, only burdened by the weight of others souls who have yet to recognize Him. And i am. The magnitude of the amount of people who either don't know Him or have no relationship with Him is staggering. I am often overwhelmed by the needs others have. And not just unsaved people. There are so many Christians sufficating in sin or weary from work or burdened by guilt or shame. There are too many Christians who preach grace and never except grace from Him for themselves. There are too many Christians who speak the gospel without having had the incredible fullness of it penetrating their own hearts fully. How can this be? And what can i do about this? I long to help. That is my life desire. I want to be a helper. I want to be a wife. I want to be a ministry partner. I want to love on the unlovable. I want to serve. There is no other life occupation that would satisfy me other than a servant. I want to be a living Martyr.